happily random

The Opposite Gene

I think my children are somehow missing the "opposite gene." Not a lot of research has been done on this gene, but evidence proves its existence every single day in my home. I walk into the kitchen in the morning to find an open loaf of bread sitting on the kitchen counter next to dirty knife and an open package of butter. The living room greets me with a scattering of toys on the floor. In the bathroom the light is on and for some reason the water is running although no one is in the room. Bedroom floors are strewn with discarded clothing, pajamas and sock (always socks).

What is this opposite gene? I'll tell you. It's the gene that reminds you that for every action there needs to be an equal and opposite reaction. For example, if you get out the bread and butter to make yourself some toast, when you are done you need to do the opposite of that: PUT IT AWAY! Close up the bread with the little closy-thingie and put it back in the pantry. Wrap up the butter and put it back in the refrigerator. Take the dirty knife and put it in the sink or, God forbid, in the dishwasher. Sometimes the kids make me think they may have that gene after all, but then I find the bread in the pantry without the closy-thingie on it and the bread wide open to the air. So maybe their opposite gene is just intermittently defective?

Whatever it is, as a mother I seem to spend an massive amount of my time either reminding my children to channel that opposite gene or correcting the failings of said gene. It seems very simple that when you go into a room and turn on a light that you would then turn off that light again when you leave the room. But then why is it that the bathroom light it is always on when I walk by it?

Of course, maybe it's not a defective opposite gene after all. Maybe it's just that my kids think that there is some magical creature who will come behind them to clean up their messes, turn off the lights and basically do all the things that they just forget to do themselves like the house-elves in Harry Potter. That must be it! I wonder what their name is for such a under-appreciated, over-worked creature of wonder?

"Moooooom!"

The Other Side

It is really easy to say, "God will provide." Especially when you're not going through anything difficult, when life is hunky-dory (did I just say that?). It's even easier to say to someone else, "Just have faith; God will provide." It's almost a cliche that we Christians say to those who are going through hard times when we don't know what else to say or how to help.

But when it's the middle of the month and you have no money to put gas in your truck let alone to make the house payment, God's provision looks a little sketchy at best. We have been there just recently. It's been several months since we have had consistent income. When December rolled around we were tapped out: no house payment, no car payment and definitely no Christmas presents.

At that point the total panic starts to set in. Where is the money going to come from? Are we going to lose our house? How are we going to make it? It's like a constant nagging in the back of your mind and an eating away at your stomach. You know God will provide. He said he would, and God can't lie. It's not that he won't lie, he can't. "And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus'" says Phillippians 4:19. Despite that, the nagging fears run through your mind constantly.

It's hard enough being broke in the middle of the year, but there is something truly heartbreaking about being broke at Christmas. Something as simple as being asked to contribute $5 to your child's class teacher gift seems like a complete impossibility when that's all the money you have in your wallet and you don't know when you will have more.

So you pray. Pray, and pray, and pray, and pray. You humble yourself and share you situation with others, asking them to pray.

You consider what you will lose if God doesn't come through in the way you want him to. What's the worse thing that could happen? Losing your house. That would really suck. Losing your car. Pretty rotten too. I am not diminishing the awfulness in those things by any means -- especially as we have been traveling that road ourselves -- but then you realize that God's blessings and God's provision cover more than just a home, a car & food on the table. We have discovered that even if we lost every material possession we have, we are still left with three wonderful blessings: the love of God, the love of family & the love of friends. We may be poor in finances, but we are billionaires in the blessings of loved ones.

Loved ones who will give -- not lend, but give -- us money to fill our gas tank.

Loved ones who will give us a place to stay if we need it.

Loved ones who will do all they possibly can to help, even if it just pray.

Never discount prayer. Never discount the prayer of others. We are to share each others burdens (Galations 6:2) and pray together. There is great power in praying together (Matthew 18:20). Share with your loved ones about the trials you are facing so they too can lift you up in prayer.

God will provide. He will. He promised he would provide, and as I said before, God can't lie. But the way he provides is not always in the manner we expect or desire. While you're going through it, it seems dark and you feel alone and desperate.

I can say this, because time and time and time again, God has provided. Faith is doing all you know to do and letting God do the rest. Sometimes that takes longer than you thought it would and looks a lot different than you expected. But he will come through. For "...we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." (Romans 8:28)

I am happy to share that in our situation, he has already come through. God sent my husband a new client on Friday with money coming in to cover us for several months. God completely changed our situation in an instant. It was such a delight to go to those that we have shared our burdens with, to those who had been praying with us, to share our joys with them as well. To share God's work with them.

You will get to the other side. You will be able to look back and see how God fulfilled his promise. Just hang on.

The Sisyphus of Laundry

With six people in our family, I'm sure you can imagine the enormous mounds of laundry I have to tackle each week. Honestly of all the chores I have to do, laundry is my least favorite. I would rather do any other chore than do laundry. I would rather scrub the grout in the bathroom with a toothbrush than do laundry. I would rather clean the toilets than do laundry. I would even rather split firewood all afternoon than do laundry. That's how much I hate doing laundry.

As far as laundry is concerned I feel like Sisyphus. Who is that you ask? Sisyphus was a figure of Greek mythology who was condemned to repeat forever the same meaningless task of pushing a boulder up a mountain, only to see it roll down again. Yeah, that's me and laundry: forever condemned to wash, fold & put away the same mountain of clothes only to have to do it all over again the next week.

That said it can be easily understood why my biggest pet peeve is finding clean clothes in the dirty laundry hamper. Nothing gets me raging more than sorting through clothing to find unworn items in the bin. Items that I spent hours sorting, washing, drying, hanging up, folding and sorting to each child's closet or drawer.This happens with my darling children get out an article of clothing to wear from their closet only to decide not to wear it. Instead of hanging it back up though they throw it on the floor which later gets picked up and thrown in the hamper while they are picking up their room.

I thought I should start a program with the local high schools as a deterrent against premarital sex and pregnancy. Each week a student would come into my home and tackle the laundry. That's it. I guarantee instant celibacy.

Snow Boots - Walking on a Cloud

I love the snow. Many people say it's because I wasn't raised in a place where it snows every winter (in San Diego we only had snow in the mountains). I don't know about that. This is our sixth winter here in the north and I still look forward to it.

Now there are certain aspects about the snow I don't like. For example, we got 6" of snow yesterday and today it's 40 degrees and the roads are a slushy, icky mess. When it snows I like the snow to just stay. I'm not a big fan of slush, which is why February and March are my two least favorite months here.

Our home is nestled in the mountains meaning we get more snow here than down in town. We have our own snow plow to dig ourselves out and I can wield a snow shovel with the best of them. One of the best tools in are arsenal of snow survival is a good pair of snow boots. I found out very quickly as far a snow boots are concerned, you definitely get what you pay for. When we first moved here I bought myself a pair of cheap snow boots at Target (and by cheap, I mean $30, so not that cheap). Not only were they a struggle to get on as I had to practically unlace them to get my feet in them, but they didn't really keep my feet warm either. When I'm trying to get four kids out the door to school in the morning and are already running out the door, I don't have 10 minutes to spend just getting my shoes on.

About a month into winter (which is like October in North Idaho -- no, not really), I stumbled across a sale at Red Oak (which is sadly no longer in business) on Sorels, which I had come to learn are THE snow boot of all snow boots. Trying them on I was ready to just leave my old snow boots right there in the store and just wear the new ones home. Actually I did wear the new ones home, but I still have the old ones too -- not sure why. Anyway, the Sorels just slid on and laced up in less time than it takes me to put on my tennis shoes. Not only that, but they weigh less than the cheapy ones but yet keep my feet warm. And they're very comfy to boot. Ha. How do they do that?

Anyway, love, love my snow boots. If there is a flake in the air, I have them on my feet. Took me slipping and falling once getting out of my car to realize that fashion is all well and good, but I would rather wear my boots and save my tailbone. Besides, there is something about wearing them that makes me feel like a real mountain gal. And who doesn't want that?

Toothbrush Dilemma

I am a big fan of electric toothbrushes. I figure a little bit of mechanical scrubbing in addition to my back and forth brushing has gotta help, right? Especially with how much I hate going to the dentist I figure the more work I can do here at home the better. My husband & I have Sonicare brushes that we both love. Honestly it feels like I just had my teeth cleaned at the dentist after using one of those babies and who doesn't want that? But the Sonicare brushes are a little too... enthusiastic for my kids to use. It actually took me several days to use it without giggling. And it's also cost-prohibitive when considering them for four children.

So, each of my kids has their own electric toothbrush, just not the $80 Sonicare ones. They get the top-of-the-line $7 kinds. I even got them with coupons and gift cards, so they didn't cost me a dime. I'm nothing if not frugal. These brushes work great for my kids, are a little lower on enthusiasm as not to scare them, and come with some kind of cartoon character on them. Makes brushing fun -- or at least as fun as it can be. But eventually these wonderful electric toothbrushes start slowing and then stopping all-together, meaning it's time for the dreaded battery-change.

Now my Sonicare toothbrush charges very easily. Just pop it into the charger and by the next evening you're ready to go. No opening it up to change out batteries. It's doesn't even plug in or have any metal contacts that I can see. You just set it inside the charger and voila! My husband says it charges by deduction, reduction... or induction.... something like that. Looks like magic to me. Especially with the difficultly involved in changing out the batteries in my children's brushes. Maybe you get what you pay for?

The batteries are dead, so now what? In our family it usually takes about a month to change the batteries in one of these toothbrushes. You'd think it would be easy: just open up the bottom and put in new ones! If only it were so easy. I say it takes a month because that's about how long it takes for me to remember to change them during the day instead of trying to do it at night when we are trying to get the kids into bed. By that time I just want them in bed... I don't care about the stupid toothbrush. Today was that fateful day.

Before you can open up this Spiderman toothbrush from Crest you have to unscrew this itty-bitty, teeny-tiny, they-don't-even-make-screwdrivers-small-enough-to-open screw.

Once upon a time, my husband was a mechanic. Currently he is a general contractor. Both of these occupations require a large supply of tools. In his thousands of dollars worth of tools, there is nary a screwdriver small enough to unscrew this screw. Cruel joke on the part of Crest, keeping us buying new toothbrushes because we can't open them up to change the batteries. Har-har. In my month-long search though I did discover a tiny screwdriver mixed in among our stash of pens -- I believe they sell them for eyeglasses which no one in our house happens to wear -- but in some sad twist of fate is was a Flathead and of course this screw requires a Phillips. Ha.

Not to be thwarted on my battery-changing quest, I had a light-bulb moment: I'll bet the tip of a knife will open that! Not a wise move on Crest's part. I can see a future including a class-action lawsuit from people who nearly severed a finger in an attempt to change their child's toothbrush batteries. I will not be one of them, as one of our our serrated steak knives quickly did the job without incident. 

I happy-danced my way across the kitchen to the battery cabinet (that is, the cabinet were we keep our packs of batteries), so excited that my son was finally going to have an operational electic toothbrush once again. I opened the cabinet door only to discover... nuts... we are out of AAAs. Of course.