How Not to Host a Garage Sale

It's garage saling season, the most wonderful time of the year if you ask me -- at least one of them anyway. I love the idea of people selling off their unwanted junk and making it my wanted junk. It's the ultimate in recycling and greenness. But for the most part I just love getting a good deal on the things that I need.

Only thing that drives me batty though is poorly organized garage sales. I am by no means the queen of organization myself (just ask my husband), but even I notice when garage sale wasn't well thought out. Don't want me to come to yours? Here's how:

1. Don't Put Up Signs. To be sure that no one visits your garage sale except those that happen to stumble across it by accident, don't put up any signs to lead people to your home. Who knows, they may just think you're cleaning out your garage.
2. Don't Make Your Signs Easy-To-Read. If you do decide to put up signs, be sure to include so much information on them in thin, light, hard-to-read writing so that a driver has to actually stop the car to be able to take them in. You may even get a traffic accident or two out of them. 
3. Don't Take Out An Ad. Your house isn't hard to find. "If you build it, they will come," right?
4. Don't Start On Time. If you do take out an ad and your ad says 8 a.m., it's okay to start putting out your stuff at 8:45. Garage salers aren't early birds anyway. Besides, they'll wait while you do it. Or come back.
5. Don't Wash or Clean Anything. Everybody has a washing machine, don't they? They're just going to take it home to wash themselves, right?
6. Don't Organize Clothes. A big pile of clothes to sort through is fun. It's like a treasure hunt. They will soon discover on their own that you don't have anything in their sizes.
7. Don't Empty Out Purses. It's like an added bonus when people buy your old purses and wallets because there may be money or car keys inside.
8. Don't Have More Than 10 Items To Sell. People don't mind coming to a garage sale that is just selling a used ice cream maker, a puzzle with missing pieces and three articles of clothing that are 40 years old. Who needs variety?
9. Don't Label Anything. People can just ask you the price if they want something. That way you can assess their car and what they are wearing and price the item just for them.
10. Don't Reasonably Price Anything. It's just junk you don't want, but it's your junk. You paid $10 for those kid's jeans, so asking $5 for them is like giving it to them for half-price. So what that they have two holes in them, that just means they are broken in.
11. Don't Take Down Your Signs. You hosted your garage sale three weeks ago, but never took down your signs because you don't want to be bothered with it. People will figure that out when they see your garage door shut. The sign will rot away on it's own eventually anyway.
12. Dont' Have Your Garage Sale. Sure, you put an ad on Craigslist and the Nickel's Worth for your garage sale, but the weather is nice and you want to go camping instead.

Comments

[Lynn P]

I was rolling on the floor laughing reading this. It's funny but so true.. Thanks for posting this :)

[Melissa K]

These are great! It drives me especially batty when things aren't priced. And I love it when people not only organize but hang the clothing (especially the adult clothing). I am far more likely to browse and buy it!

[shan]

oh.....so true! Wish we could hit the hunt together!