What Would Jane Austen Think?

In a day and age where there are dozens of ways to communicate with each other, why does is seem that our communication skills have diminished over the last hundred years? There was a time where you didn't visit others unannounced. If you were sent an invitation to a party, you sent your regrets if you could not attend. Appointments made were appointments kept. It would seem that with a cell phone in everyone's pocket with the ability to call, text, email, Facebook or tweet right at our fingertips, our communication would be thorough to the point of annoyance. But that is not the case.

What happened to RSVPing? Most people don't realize that RSVP means "répondez, s'il vous plaît" or in English, "please reply." It doesn't mean "let me know if you are coming, but if you're not coming, you can just ignore the invitation." It is the simple courtesy of responding to someone who was nice enough to invite you, even if it is to say that you regret that you will not be able to attend. But in my experience, not many people do that anymore.

What happened to calling to let someone know you would be late, or not coming? I have experienced this lack of communication from my private voice students. Thankfully I am paid for lessons in advance at the beginning of each month, because I have had students that have paid for weekly voice lessons for the month, only to show up to one lesson the entire month. And I don't do makeup lessons for those that cancel the day of. No call to say they are running late or sick or whatever. This is despite my email reminder of their lesson time the day before. I know that my hairstylist has the same problem and has to call each of her appointments the night before to make sure they're going to show. Don't people have Day Planners or know how to use the calendars on their phones?

While the stuffiness of Jane Austen's era would not suit me, sometimes I long for the days where people thought about... people other than themselves. Etiquette and common courtesy seem like a foreign concept these days. I would love to see people following through on their commitments, being responsible for their actions, and always striving to think of others. Doesn't seem like it should be that difficult, but I am sad to see that it seems all too acceptable these days. Ultimately etiquette is the art of making other people comfortable. What would Jane Austen think she had arrived on another planet if she were to step into our world today?

Comments

[Lynn P]

Very well written and I totally agree with you. I am actually going through the same thing right now with people RSVPing for my son's bday party. I have to go and contact each and everyone of them to see if they are coming. They don't tell me yes or no.. It's frustrating because we do live in a society where communication is so easy and quick but we don't seem to care.. Thanks for posting this reminder to today's world.. It would be nice if we could get back to the good old fashion attitude of thinking of others!!